Sunday Sentiment

 Yesterday, our family suffered a great loss. The youngest son of a family friend tragically passed away in a swimming accident. He was just 24, but had already lived a full and adventurous life. Although he grew up in a different state and we didn't get to see him very often, I thought of him almost as a distant older brother. Every year at Easter, he and his brother would join us in our egg hunt. After he and his family moved away, we only saw him once or twice a year-- at Christmas or Easter. Once, when I was seven or eight years old, we visited his new house in Vermont. We went to a play, and I rode with him and his brother on the way there. They told me that every time you passed a graveyard, you had to hold your breath until it was out of sight or the dead people would come after you. I think I believed that story until I was eleven or twelve years old. I remember he liked to collect camels figurines when he was young, and I saw his collection once. I wish I had gotten to know him better as I got older, because I so enjoyed hearing about his exploits and adventures in college and beyond. I last saw him in 2009 at the joyful occasion of his graduation from college. I hope that as his family and friends mourn the loss of him in this life, his gentle soul will continue to live on and comfort them until they meet again.

Prayer for Cleansing and Pardon

Well, I'm back at school for my last semester as an undergraduate. It is really a bittersweet feeling-- and due to some unhappy circumstances at the end of last semester, I was very anxious about returning. For comfort, I had been working my way through the book of 2 Chronicles as well as the book of Psalms each night before bed. One night, not long ago, I prayed that God would give me the strength, courage, and grace to return to school and put things right. Then I opened my bible to this Psalm, Psalm 51:

"Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your steadfast mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you alone, have I sinned, and done what is evil in your sight, so that you are justified in your sentence and blameless when you pass judgement. Indeed, I was born guilty, a sinner when my mother conceived me. You desire truth in the inward being; therefore teach me wisdom in my secret heart. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me. Do not cast me away from your presence, do not take your holy spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and sustain in me a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.
Deliver me from bloodshed, O God, O God of my salvation, and my tongue will sing aloud of your deliverance. O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. For you have no delight in sacrifice; if I were to give you a burnt offering, you would not be pleased. The sacrifice acceptable to God is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. Do good to Zion in your good pleasure; rebuild the walls of Jerusalem, then you will delight in right sacrifices, in burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings; then bulls will be offered on your altar."

Because I had strayed far from Him in the dark times of the past few months, I was finally broken. And because I came to God with my fears, my praises, and my sadness, He comforted me with words and actions. Praise the Lord, for He is good, and His steadfast love endures forever!

Back to Life

After a long break from blogging, I've recently been inspired by some dear friends to revive my blog, and fill it with some of the wonderful things that I've done over the past few months.

Before I totally refresh this blog, here is an update on my life since October 2010:

• Fall semester finished up with a grand total of 7 final research papers, two final exams, and one massive presentation.
• I successfully survived my first semester living with a roommate since my stint as an RA !
• After a rough start to October with the deaths of a dear middle school teacher and my great uncle Jack, we (my family and I) pulled through the rest of the month to finish with a bang at our Batman-themed Halloween party.
• I met some wonderful new people at school over the course of the semester, and I am grateful for the blessing to have them in my life!
  
• As president of my residence hall, I oversaw some wonderful events including Floor Wars, Relaxation Week events, holiday food drives, and a visit to a local nursing home.
  
• I celebrated a wonderful holiday season with my family and friends, rejoicing in the birth of our Lord and the fellowship that the holidays bring!

I am thankful for the blessings of the past year, and I hope that 2011 will prove to be just as lovely!

Sometimes a hug is all you need.

Sometimes a hug is all you need. It doesn't necessarily solve your problems or make you feel better, but a hug is a sort of symbol.

Last week, I received the news that one of my teachers from the middle school years had committed suicide. It was a terrible incident that shook the whole community and disrupted the lives of so many in my small town. Being here at school, I was so far from the event itself that I had almost no reaction to the news. It haunted me so, that I called my parents to get more details that night after all my events for the day were done. The details were horrible, and after I had hung up the phone, I was numb. I still could not react, so I stood in the hallway outside my door until my friend Annie stopped to talk to me. She told me about something funny that had just happened to her, but I couldn't really listen. After she had finished her story, I told her everything that I had just learned, and what I thought, and how I didn't know what to do.

Then Annie hugged me, and I started to cry. That hug was exactly what I had needed to get me started. It was the kind of hug that let me know that God was watching out for me, and that it was alright to grieve. It didn't make the sadness less painful, or wash away the images flooding my mind, but it was a symbol of all-encompassing love. That no matter where I am or who I am with, God's loving hand will be there to support me.