Quick Update: Prepping for the GGSE

In 6 months or less, I will be leaving for the Great Graduate School Experiment. In the meantime, I have been whittling away at my abundance of free time. Here are some tidbits about my life since I last posted.

Work

-Traveled to Las Vegas for a trade show with my mom's company. It was a blast seeing the lights and action of Vegas, and I really liked working at the show!

-Finally everything is in line for me to become a substitute teacher in the local school district. I have desperately missed working with children, and I'm excited to be able to serve my community in a new way! My first scheduled teaching position is the last week of October, but perhaps I'll find a few other opportunities along the way.

-The daughter of a family friend swims six days a week, and I've been helping to transport her to and from her swim practices. It's a blessing to help out a friend, and spending so much time driving also allows me to take in the beauty of fall in New England.

-November vacation camp with the recreation department is all ready to go. My co-camp director and I are so excited to be offering a two-day camp exploring the origins of Thanksgiving-- including a trip to Plimoth Plantation in Massachusetts (my future dream job)!

-Still working to get my seamstress business off the ground. Some of my work was on display at the town library between August and October, and my dresses in particular were given a lot of attention. I have made plans to attend a few local craft fairs and markets, and hopefully will be selling some items before Christmas. Look for the Rainy Day Seamstress near you.

-I met and played with some of the children in that I hope to be spending time with come February. The kids are all part of an early childhood program at our local community center, and when my friend Lisa goes on maternity leave in a few months, I will be taking her place for a few weeks.

-Since August, I've been housekeeping for my parents-- cleaning the house top to bottom every week. It's a tough job because as soon as I've vacuumed the dog starts scratching, the cat sheds, the bird molts, and I have to get rid of the dust and grime all over again. But I actually like to clean and organize, so it gives me an opportunity to rid myself of excess compusivity.

-After speaking with the president of the local historical society, I have been given the opportunity to join the board and work with the society on a number of projects. It will be a wonderful chance to work in my field during my year at home.

Play

-In September I had the opportunity to visit some dear friends around the state. I will also be visiting UNH for homecoming this weekend. Hopefully I will be able to see a number of my school friends while I am on the other side of the state.

-I've been working hard to train my little Ollie bird. Since he came to live with us a little over a year ago, Ollie has been a bit wild. Unlike any other bird we've owned, Ollie would eat no "people food", would not perch on a finger, and did not talk or whistle. During the summer I spent hours talking to him, feeding him garden vegetables, and handling him on a regular basis. Within the last month, he has become (almost) a normal bird. He talks endlessly in my voice, scavenges for breakfast cereal and carrots, and will come out of his cage with hardly a squawk. Despite my family telling me that I'll end up a crazy bird lady, I'm very proud of all the work we've accomplished ;-)

-In my really free time, I have been sewing and/or plotting to sew all kinds of projects. It's just about time to think about Christmas, and I'm feeling prepared for the first time in years. Of course, part of that is that I don't have to take any exams or research any theses for the first time in my life, but still, it's nice to feel like I've got a grip on something.

-Although it's been dreary and grey for the past two weeks, I've taken every opportunity to work in the garden. We haven't got much left, but it makes me feel better to know that my beds and compost will be in good shape for the winter. Considering that I won't have much of an opportunity to garden in DC, I'm hoping that all the houseplants I've been repotting will be able to survive the big move. Most of our houseplants live on the porch during the summer, but I'm slowly collecting them in my room again as the cold nights settle in.

-I'm also spending a lot of time in the kitchen copying family recipes into my new recipe book, trying out said recipes, and preserving whatever has come my way. So far I've put up 12 pints mint jelly, 12 pints plum jelly, 26 quarts dill pickles, 3 quarts pickled zucchini, 6 quarts applesauce, and countless dried veggies, fruits, herbs and tea ingredients. I'm still planning on another 6 quarts applesauce tomorrow.

Wow. That's a long "quick" update. I'll stop now and leave the rest for another day.

Garden Beginnings 2012

 We've barely planted all our vegetables, but the garden is going crazy already! The New Hampshire winter was so mild this year that most of our perennials are weeks ahead of themselves. The only downside is that with the mild winter, the squirrel and chipmunk population has exploded. I have to be very careful not to direct seed anything, because the chipmunks will swarm once I've left the garden. It's frustrating because half of what I've planted has been eaten before it could even sprout!

 In any case, we've got much of the same garden spread this year. Pickling cucumbers, peppermint, oregano, dill, edamame, summer squash, purple pole beans, sugar snap peas, lettuce, Asian greens, potatoes, tomatoes, strawberries, rhubarb, horseradish, etc. A neighbor gave us an artichoke, which I planted near the compost. It's been in for about a month, and it seems to be doing quite well. I also transplanted some raspberry canes which were growing wild behind the garage. We'll see how things go with that experiment.

 I'm trying to diversify my herb collection, and in addition to my chamomile, mint, thyme, dill, chives, lavender, parsley, oregano, rosemary, basil, etc, I have added yarrow, lemon balm, and bee balm.

Adventuring

One of the best ways for me to internalize events, explore my thoughts, express my emotions, and spend some time with myself is to go adventuring.

When I was little, adventuring meant scrambling over rocks and between branches in the little patch of trees behind our garage. My dad called it the "Hundred Acre Wood" just like the forest in Winnie the Pooh. As I got older, adventuring became bike rides all over town, and hiking in the town forest with my friends. When I got to college, I found that adventuring was the perfect way to leave behind the stress of classes, homework, and social anxiety. I walked and biked miles of trails and roadways, discovering the most beautiful and tranquil places to sit and think.

I have experienced almost divine serenity in these places. Before I graduate, (in less than a month now) I feel that I must share with the world those wonderful spaces which helped me through my four years at school.

Spring is Here...and HOW!

Let it be known that today, March 22nd 2012, I spent an 85 degree day at the ocean. I dipped my feet in the frigid waters of the Atlantic, sat on the rocks, basked in the sun, collected trinkets at the beach, and gained a few dozen freckles. It was glorious.

The past week has been absolutely gorgeous-- and I don't mean that in the sense that I usually do at this time of year. Once upon a time, I considered 45 degrees and sunny to be the mildest March weather. In a traditional New Hampshire spring, a 45 degree day is rare, and one can generally count on a Nor'easter to sweep the region in the days following. But this week has been the warmest on record; five consecutive days of sun, blue skies, and temperatures above 75 degrees.

In many ways, I am taking the events of this week as a sign from the heavens. On Monday, I had a long talk with God. Since October, I have been an emotional wreck. I haven't allowed myself to be truly happy or appreciative of the blessings around me, and I've fallen away from the confidence and happiness that I have spent the past four years creating for myself.

Much of this emotional unrest has had to do with a relationship that I fell into at the beginning of the fall. In December, all that I had invested in this relationship-- my love, care, time, trust, expectations, physical and spiritual being, personal standards, happy moments, heartfelt discussions, and shared experiences-- was ripped away. I felt shipwrecked, trying to cling to one of these things to stay afloat as dark waves crashed over me. But collecting splintered wood will not help to restore the majesty of the ship.

As the weeks and months went on I tried to keep life in the relationship, even as friends. I am not the sort of person who will push people out of my life. I try as hard as I can to maintain contact and good feelings with others, and the months following our breakup were no different. My friends told me that I had every right to be angry at him--- he was the one who dumped me, after all-- but I still thought that kindness, interest, and friendly outreach would help us both to move on. After too many nights of frustrating conversations, lukewarm interactions, and angry tears, I asked God to show me what He wanted me to see in this situation.

Since my Monday conversation with God, I have been feeling lighter, clearer, and warmer. I have been able to let go of the feelings that have gripped my heart and soul for the past four months. It will take a long time before I can completely move on from this, but God has shown me what He wants me to focus on right now: my future.

The future can be so unclear sometimes. When you're young it looms ahead of you on the path of life, making every step toward it seem like a great burden. Sometimes it looks green and bright, like a beautiful spring day inviting you to run toward it and bask in its glory. Other times it can act like a fat black thundercloud threatening to block out the sun. The funny thing about it is that as long as you walk, and as many steps as you take, you never really get any closer. New experiences wait for you along the path, and sometimes you gather new friends as you walk along.

This week, God has revealed the future as a beautiful spring day. His reminders to me have been in the clear blue skies, the new green grass, the timid purple flowers, the cool and caressing breeze, and the warm sunshine on my skin. My future will be clear, bright, and happy.

Let it out

Today the world seems to be letting it all go.

Yesterday was a rough day, full of anticipation for finals, anxiety about friends, end-of-year frustration, and pent-up energy. To make it worse, the weather was grey, chilly, and ominous all day. I awoke today to the sound of heavy rain outside. It was almost as if the sky couldn't take the suspense, and let loose the torrents of water that have now soaked the campus. The suspense is over for me as well. I finished the last exam of my sophomore year, and now instead of studying or puttering around in my room as I have been doing the past few days, I am free to do whatever I like.

The small trickle of residents that I've been signing out of their rooms over the past week has turned into a stream of inventories, room checks, and goodbye hugs. Tomorrow the rest of my freshman (now sophomores,) will lock their rooms for the last time, and move out for the summer. My emotions are starting to get the better of me, as I've begun to realize that this is not just a break, and that the people I've seen every day for the past ten months will no longer be living with me. Come Saturday, I'll no longer be an RA, and by next week, I'll officially be free of school for the 2009-2010 year.

So much has happened in the past year, I can't even begin to comprehend it. The weeks slipped by too quickly, and for all my longing to be done with school, I know that I'll miss it as soon as I'm home. I've been trying to pray more often, and with my hyper-sensitivity about the end of the year, I'm finding a lot more to pray about.

My poor friend, Katie, was spending the last few days of school here, waiting to take her final on Thursday. We had been planning wonderful trips and adventures to get us through the week, but all of it was cut short when she got sick on Monday. I had been bringing her soup and other things throughout the week in hopes that she would get better and be able to have some fun before going home, but today I called from the dining hall to ask if she needed anything, and she told me she was in the hospital with what they thought was a "ruptured appendix". I've been praying for her health and recovery, but there is no way that she will be well enough to attend her exam and move out on time.

The end of the school year was always busy in high school, middle school, and elementary school, but I never expected it to be like that in college! I can only hope that this overwhelming flow of events and emotions slows down within the next few days and leads into a relaxing summer.

Procrastination and a Clean Room

One of my greatest talents is procrastination. I don't know how I developed it as my parents are both very driven individuals. In my case, procrastination can result in the accomplishment of almost everything but schoolwork. That is not to say that my schoolwork doesn't get done, but it is not completed over a planned and extended period of time. My best work is born from pressure. Ironically, so are my best prayers.

Today I don't have a lot of work, just reading for my class in two hours and for my class tomorrow morning. I might have been motivated to get it done earlier if I had not felt the need to clean my room and do my laundry for the first time since Spring Break. Also, it's raining, which I don't appreciate. But as soon as my laundry is done, I think I'll get to my homework.